Wednesday, September 21, 2016

19 Movie Reviews

Where else on the Internet can you get 19 movie reviews in one post? I have not updated any of my movie "reviews" for a couple months. I should actually call them ratings since I am too lazy and far behind to do an actual review. Here goes the briefest of summaries. Just pay attention to the score.

Creed- It was pretty good. I give props to Stalone for allowing someone else to finally be the main character in the Rocky universe. I give it 7.3

Bridge of Spies- Very good spy thriller.  It relies on suspense more than action. Tom Hanks can do no wrong. 7.8

The Fifth Wave- Teenage science fiction. Better than I expected when it started but then it dropped off quickly.  5.9


Central Intelligence- It had some funny parts but I didn't like the Rock in this quite as much as I have in his other stuff. 6.7

The Legend of Tarzan- Pretty decent Tarzan adaptation but I only give it 6.8

Suicide Squad- Entertaining but there were several things I didn't like about it. 3 or 4 characters carried the show, the rest were just filler. 6.5

Ben Hur- The original is one of my favorite movies and one of the greatest movies of all time so I was expecting a crapfest with this remake. It took a bit of a different direction with many artistic liberties, but it was much better than I thought it would be. I'm shocked that I'm giving it 6.6 stars.


Thanks to VidAngel I have caught up on a bunch of rated R movies I had not seen before. Some of these movies are current but many came out years ago.

10 Cloverfield Lane- Suspenseful. John Goodman had a great performance. It was better before the aliens appeared. 7.4

The Revenant- Very intense and grizzly. 7.7

Gran Torino- I love Clint Eastwood's work but I was expecting more from all the hype I had heard over the years but it was still very good. 7.8

The Kingdom- I really liked this suspenseful war movie about the middle east and terrorism. I was captivated the whole time. 8.0 stars.

127 Hours- I had heard about the true story this was based on so I was looking forward to it. Good acting by James Franco but it was kind of hard to watch. 7.4

The Butterfly Effect- I like most movies involving time travel and do overs. It's not a pick me up movie but had some good stuff in it. 7.9

District 9- Kind of depressing science fiction especially for someone who thought we were mean to E.T. back in the 80's. 7.6

London Has Fallen- Totally fake action movie but still entertaining. 6.5

Safe House- Is Denzel Washington a good guy or bad guy? 7.0

Looper- Again I have to give time travel extra points. It stretches your mind 7.7

John Wick- Extremely violent but pretty well done. 7.2

28 Days Later- I got into this Zombie movie 7.8

Escape Plan- I fell asleep watching it 6.1

13 Hours: The Soldiers of Benghazi- Pretty Intense. It was good to see Jim and Roy from The Office Reunited.  7.6 stars.




Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Captain America vs. X-Men

Several months ago I saw Captain America: Civil War as well as X-Men: Apocalypse. Here are some of my thoughts on the two movies.

Both movies are about superheroes and super villains who have powers we will never have so that is kind of depressing to start off with. When Hollywood actors prepare for roles in a movie these days they get in way better shape than most people ever will so that is also depressing for most of us. When they finish the movie many of these actors drop the chicken breast and broccoli diet and stop working out 4 hours a day like they have been for the past 9 months and then they look like they did before. That is probably depressing for them. I didn't mean for this review to be so depressing so I will address something else.



Both movies have a familiar theme of friends fighting against each other much like Superman vs. Batman did. I hate seeing good guys fight each other. It breaks my heart and is actually a little depressing.

In summary, I give the latest Captain America 7.9 stars and X-Men 7.2 stars. If you want more details or something of actual substance then you should probably go see the actual movies instead of just relying on my crappy reviews.

Monday, April 18, 2016

Batman vs. Superman and The Jungle Book

Batman vs. Superman: The Dawn of Justice


I've had mixed feelings about this movie while I have anticipated it's release over the last year. I'm not a comic book geek so the concept of two good superheroes fighting each other was a little foreign to me and I felt like a parent watching two of my kids fight. The critics blasted this movie and I was shocked to see it only got 28% positive reviews on Rotten Tomatoes but those who understand the comic book history and details really liked it. I especially liked the first half of the movie and felt Ben Affleck was much better than I thought he would be as Batman. The movie got a little out of control at the end but it was still good and fun to get some Wonder Woman, Aqua Man, Flash teasers in the film. If you like action and comic books you will like the movie, If not you may be confused and overwhelmed.

I give it 7.4 stars.


The Jungle Book


I was very pleasantly surprised at how well done The Jungle Book was. It paid homage to the original Disney animated version quite well while still maintaining a realistic gritty feel. There were only two occasions where the characters broke into song but it was definitely not a musical. I didn't feel like I was watching a movie for kids and the lead kid who plays Mowgli did a good job and was not too cute.  The special effects were amazing and all I can say is that CG has come a long way since Jumanji. The voice talents of the cast were well done and I am impressed with John Favreau as a director. I haven't seen a film that entertaining that the whole family could enjoy for a very long time. It's worth the visual effects alone.

I give The Jungle Book a solid 8.0 stars.

Tuesday, March 8, 2016

Ghostbusters Remake

Earlier this year I heard that there was going to be a Ghost Busters remake, reboot, or sequel or whatever with a female cast. I think it is hard to compete against Bill Murray and the original gang but I was open minded and was looking forward to the idea until I saw the trailer this week.


I hate to judge a book by it's cover, but that movie looks horrible and not very funny, which is a shame since there are some funny women in the cast. I hope it doesn't suck as bad as it looks like it will.

Monday, February 29, 2016

More VidAngel movie reviews

Over the last month I have continued watching movies on VidAngel and I love their service. They have a better selection than Netflix and it costs less than Redbox and you can edit your movies. Here is my my brief summaries on the most recent movies I've finally gotten around to watching.

Ant-man- I really didn't want to see this and thought the preview looked lame. It is not one of the stronger Marvel movies but I liked it more than anticipated thanks to Paul Rudd and the comedic element. I give it 7.1 stars.

Zombieland- As the title suggests, it's a Zombie Horror movie with a comedic twist. It reminded me of a mix between The Walking Dead and Scot Pilgrim vs. the World. I enjoyed it. 7.3 brains.

The Gift- This was a great suspense thriller about a creepy stalker, It was a little odd to see Jason Bateman in a role that had no comedy. There were several twists throughout the movie. It was also directed by Joel Edgerton who stars as Gordo the antagonist.. I give it 7.5 stalkers

Drive- A slow but gritty story of a stunt driver who gets tangled up driving for the mob.His life gets further complicated when he gets involved with the wife on an ex con who he tries to help. It is a drama/action movie in slow motion. I give it 7.5 tire squeals.

Horrible Bosses- This was extremely dirty and crude (and I was watching the PG-13 version) but it is also incredibly funny. I'm not sure how much credit to give the writers and how much to give the hilarious cast, but I laughed a lot. I give it 6.9 harassment filings.

No Country For Old Men- Not a pick me up Cohen Brothers movie. It has minimal quirkiness you might expect from them and was surprisingly violent and suspenseful. Well done and very intense. I give it 7.9 briefcases of cash.

Olympus Has Fallen- Better than I expected for a totally fake action movie but it was still entertaining You might like this if you enjoyed watching Furious 7 or Michael Bay movies. If you suspend your sense of reality it is alright. I give it  6.7 secret service agents.

Sicario- Very intense, realistic portrayal of the fight against drug lords. Emily Blunt plays an FBI agent who is thrust into a mysterious government military mission where she is kept in the dark for most of it. Great performances by the entire cast and very well done. I give it 8.0 severed heads.

Lucy- Had some great potential. The concept reminded me of Limitless which I really liked. I knew it got bad reviews but still kind of enjoyed it.seeing Scarlet Johansson beat up on bad guys and become more powerful as she was able to utilize all of her brain's capacity.. I give it 6.6 Morgan Freeman narratives.

Focus- A movie about con artists which glamorizes the life of crime as long as you are stealing from mean people. It reminded me of a modern day version of The Sting and was pretty good but Margot Robie is prettier than Paul Newman.. It had some nice twists in it and I give it 7.0 pickpockets.

Snowpiercer- A post Apocalyptic Sci Fi movie staring Chris Evans about a train that travels in a continual loop around the world. The passengers at the back of the train are slaves and those at the front lead a life of luxury. The slaves try to  revolt and take over the train. It's kind of like the class warfare on an airplane between coach and first class but on steroids. There are many twists and surprises throughout the movie. I thought it was an original movie. I give it 7.4 protein blocks.
 
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