The Parental Video Curse

I was recently reminiscing with a friend about watching videos as a kid and I had some funny memories. Many times while watching a video, whenever a part with swearing, sex, or nudity would come on, a parent would always come walking in the room. These were not bad movies we watched either, this would happen regardless of what they were rated. You could rent some rated G Disney movie and Pollyanna would start doing some inappropriate nasty dance as soon as a parent came in the room. (Not that she ever did that and not that I ever watched Pollyanna).

On one occasion I was at a friends house with several others watching a murder mystery which was very entertaining. My friend's Dad came in and sat down and within 15 seconds of that time there was a major shift in the direction and content of the movie and it got extremely uncomfortable. I just remember a minute later the TV was turned off and our video party was over. I walked home in a daze wondering what had happened and where that scene came from. I now know that it was just the parental video curse.

When I was a teenager, my brother in law rented Conan the Barbarian and left it at our house. I didn't even think about the rating and I started watching it with my friend. We didn't get too far into it when my Dad came downstairs and sat down. Conan had just killed some guys in a competition and his slave masters brought a lady wearing a leather bikini to his cage to reward him. My spidey senses kicked in and I knew where this might lead so I said "I just remember I am supposed to draw a basketball for my art class" and I hurried out of the room. I left my friend with my Dad and came back about 10 minutes later. When I returned, my friend was red faced. He was embarrassed and is still angry with me to this day. My Dad suggested we turn the movie off. I never did see how it ended but I'm still glad I took my "homework break" when I did.

Another thing I have noticed over the years is how you forget so much about a movie you saw a long time ago. Many times I have told someone how much I enjoyed a certain movie I saw when I was younger so I recommend it to them or rent it for myself and later find myself saying "I don't ever remember that scene" or "I had no idea they swore so much in this", or "I promise this was rated PG".

So I just want to give a heads up to all the young people out there and let them know next time you are planning a video (DVD) party go to IMDB or Screenit first for content details because it is guaranteed that if there is any questionable content in the video you are watching that your parents will walk in the room at the very most uncomfortable moment.

Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Roderick Rules

I don't usually get into kids movies, but since my kids have been talking about Roderick Rules for a while, I recently decided to rent it. Actually it was more of a rent to own transaction. I'm on a six month payment plan. Just kidding, I just thought it sounded strange that a famous movie critic like myself would have to rent a movie. I will try to focus and get back on topic now.

Roderick Rules is a sequel to Diary of a Wimpy Kid which is a popular short book series. This movie is about Greg and his mean older brother Roderick and their struggles as they try to get along with each other. All of the characters from the original movie returned for this installment so it is pretty much a clean continuation of the first movie. I think I may have actually enjoyed this movie a little more than the first one.

I had a good time watching Diary of a Wimpy Kid 2 with my kids and despite its shortcomings, I still give it 6.6 stars. It was pretty funny and I actually had some pretty good laughs during it.

The Eagle

The Eagle is a movie about a young Roman centurion who attempts to find out what happened to the lost legion his Father led to battle 20 years ago. No one in his father's expedition was ever heard from and the emblem of the golden Eagle was also lost which brought dishonor to his family.

Marcus Aquila takes command of a new post in Britain and and after being wounded in battle, he is eventually discharged from duty. He then decides to solve the mystery behind his father's disappearance with only the help of his newly acquired slave.

Channing Tatum, Jamie Bell, and Donald Sutherland star in this movie. Their performances were alright, but I was only mildly entertained with this movie so I had a hard time really getting into it.

I'm no history expert, but I thought it was strange that the Celts in Britain looked like Native American Indians complete with Mohawks and war paint. There was also a battle scene early in the movie that reminded me of a classic Cowboys and Indians scene with the Romans defended their fort from a night attack.

I also found it distracting that the actors spoke with American accents and used modern day language. It wouldn't have surprised me to hear words like Dude and awesome coming from some of the Romans.

The Eagle was alright. It 's not bad, it's just no Gladiator. I give it 6.7 stars for being somewhat entertaining.

X-Men: 1st Class

I recently saw a behind the scenes documentary about the Cuban missile crisis. It was very informative and much more entertaining than what I learned about this event in high school. I liked the X-Men First Class prequel for the following reasons:

1) I thought the casting of the young Dr. Xavier and Magneto was well done. I could see those actors turning into Patrick Stewart and Ian McClellan down the road.

2) I really liked the first part of the movie about Eric seeking revenge against the evil Nazi doctor.

3) The cold war/retro backdrop to the movie was a nice change.

4) This 5th X-Men movie got me thinking about which mutant superpowers I'd like to have. Teleporting, healing, and flying would be nice, but I think I'd be content with the ability to read people's thoughts and have mind control over them like Dr. Xavier. I probably wouldn't abuse that power that much.

I didn't care for all the teen mutants with insignificant roles in the movie, especially the dragonfly winged chick and the sonic screamer kid. (Sorry comic book nerds, I don't remember their names) It also didn't make sense how easily Mystique abandoned Charles at the end of the movie.

I also felt that this movie started very strong but lost steam as it moved on. Even so, I give X-Men First Class 7.6 stars since it was pretty good for a prequel.

Super 8

Super 8 has been on my "to see" list for a while and I finally got around to seeing it last night. This is a movie about a group of  teenagers who make their own low budget movies with a Super 8 camera. While working on one of their productions, they witness a train crash and soon realize that an alien escaped from the train and is roaming their town. They are forced to keep a low profile from the Air Force officials who are investigating the wreck and trying to cover up the incident.

This movie takes place in the late 70's and has an authentic feel to it much like the prior movie I reviewed. I really liked the performance of the young kids who were cast in this movie. I found their teenage camaraderie to be very entertaining, but they could hardly make it through a scene without heavy swearing. I liked the story of them making movies even more than I did the actually movie. I also found it interesting that there was really only one female character with more than two lines in this movie.

This movie was directed by J.J. Abrams and has a very Spielberg-esque feel to it. It features elements of movies like Close Encounters and ET, but this alien was not as cute and doesn't like Reece's pieces. I felt that the movie paid too much homage to prior Spielberg films. There was once scene where I was totally expecting a bicycle to start flying in the moonlight.

The biggest problem I had with Super 8 was how the movie resolved itself. I felt like I had dozed off and missed a couple scenes as the final scene showed the alien leaving earth and returning home in his spaceship he had repaired with car engines and microwaves.

There are some big plot holes and some distracting inaccuracies like a pickup truck driving head on into a speeding 20 car train and demolishing it while leaving the truck only half destroyed and the driver alive. Despite hard to ignore details like this, I still enjoyed Super 8 and give it 7.2 stars.